Dandy in Afghanistan

Howdy Gang,

Happy September to all of you. Fall is rapidly approaching and y’all are probably looking forward to rolling up your garden hoses and stowing them in the shed and mowing the lawns for the last time this season.

This week’s topic is the Clamshell gym. You’re probably wondering why the heck is it called the Clamshell. Well simply put, it’s a massive tent with exercise equipment it in. and it’s shaped like a clamshell. It has all of your standard exercise equipment; treadmills, bikes, eliptical, stretching mats, weight lifting machines, etc. It’s the place I spend two hours a day for six days a week. It’s like a bee hive with bees buzzing around from bench press to dumb bells to the bike making their contribution to the queen bee. One day I counted 37 men and 4 women there. Yes, women are quite the minority there.

We have the regulars, the drop ins, the staff, and the local national (LN) workers. I’m a regular along with three of my co-workers. There is one regular that is worth mentioning.

“Fe Fi Fo Fum” – A tall, heavier, bald, civilian who always wears colored sweat pants with cargo pockets. I think he may be Turkish and he only ever rides the bike. He pedals so vigorously that I’m afraid he might just pop his hips off one day. By the time he’s done, he climbs off of the bike and walks around shaking his hands and kicking his legs out loosely as he walks around. He looks like he has a corn cob stuck up his bum. He’s quite comical to watch.

I know what your thinking. Now, Dandy that’s just wrong. But I probably have my own description too. I’m the clumsy Air Force girl with the flippy hair that trips on her towel on the treadmill and can only brench press 45 pounds. I know I’m not “Miss Shape 2009″, but that’s exactly why I’m there.

The drop ins are they ones I’ve only seen one or twice here or there. The staff wear jeans and various colored polo shirts with “MWR” embroidered on them. They give the LNs their tasks for the day. There must be at least eight LNs doing various jobs around the gym. Some of them wear their traditional linen man pajamas and others wear jeans with tee shirts, but they all wear top dollar kicks. I’m talking about them wearing Nikes, New Balance, you name it, they’re wearing it. It must be like the first thing they save up to buy. Most of them are short in stature and slim in build with dark black hair and a minimum of at least a mustache for facial hair. They keep pretty busy stocking the triple door water cooler with bottled water, folding towels, taking out the trash, and wiping down the hard surfaces of the gym. Watching them work helps pass some of the 45 minutes I spend on the treadmill.

Good Day!

Dandy 198.1 miles to go Aaron